Post by Mr.Christmas on Oct 4, 2004 19:35:47 GMT -5
Once a year - usually in October - Santa sits down with a media representative and fields questions. As in years past, Santa has asked journalists from all news organizations to consolidate their questions into this one interview. Santa almost agreed to meet with Barbara Walters this year, but declined the invite because he can't really decide what kind of tree he would be, if he were a tree. So he is sitting down with Archie Nichols, Professor of Journalism at the University of Southern North Dakota, for this year's interview:
Q: Hello, Santa. Have you had a good year?
A: Yes, Archie, hello. It has been an excellent year.
Q: How big is the naughty list this year, Santa?
A: Bigger than ever. We just might set a record. We haven't seen a year like this since 1968.
Q: I remember that year.
A: I'll bet you do, Archie. What did you do with all that coal?
Q: (laughs) We had a barbeque, of course. Santa, are you still giving coal out to bad little kids?
A: No, no. That's an old wives tale, actually. Coal back in the old days was actually a good thing. Folks needed it to cook and to stay warm. A child might not want to get coal instead of a toy, but they never turned it away. Nowadays, giving coal to a child would be a little mean, I think.
Q: How do you know if a kid has been bad or good?
A: Well, to be honest, you can just kind of tell. In my mind, all kids are good. I mean, they're kids, they don't know everything. I don't think there are too many who intend to be bad.
Q: So why then all the focus on the naughty list?
A: Hey, you asked the question, I didn't bring it up.
Q: Yes, but you said it was the worst year since 1968.
A: Yes, but weren't you about 9 years old that year? If I recall right, Archie, you had a pretty rough year in 1968.
Q: I think you're right. But I still think I had a good Christmas.
A: Yes, you had a great Christmas. You were a rowdy kid. But look at you now. You're okay. I always knew you would be. You're an inspiration to children everywhere, Archie. If you can come around anyone can.
Q: Oh, Santa, stop it.
A: Ok, but enough about this naughty business. The world is too caught up with this whole idea of Santa knowing who's good and who's not.
Q: Kids everywhere are worried if they are on the list though - how can they tell?
A: Oh, those that are know it, believe me. If you're unsure, then you're probably not on the list.
Q: How much of your time do you spend on the Naughty List, Santa?
A: None. A kid ends up on the naughty list because his Mom or Dad wants him there, usually. I get lots of letters and most are from kids but many come from parents too. They usually want to know what to do about a rowdy kid and sometimes they put their own kid on the naughty list.
Q: Really? What kind of Mom would put her own kid on Santa's Naughty List?
A: Usually a very good mom. If a Mom comes to me with this kind of a problem that means she is intent on making it better. My hat is off to Moms like that. Look, the naughty list is just that - a list. Like going to the grocery store, it's just something to remind you. Being on the naughty list doesn't mean you won't have a good Christmas. And it doesn't mean you'll get coal. It just means we need to work with that kid a little more and that means different things for different kids. But I'm not about tracking bad kids. I don't have time for such silliness.
Q: Really, Santa? What about all that "he knows when you're sleeping" stuff?
A: Pretty simple, really. A kid usually sleeps with his eyes closed. When I see a kid with his eyes closed I assume he's asleep. That's how I know.
Q: You mean that if a kid is doing something bad you don't actually know it or see it?
A: Not always. I don't have time to watch every kid. But if a kid is out of line I usually hear about it.
Q: Are you sure you want that information going out to the world?
A: I believe in being honest. I never once said I was a spy. That was something the world made up, but it never came from me.
Q: But Santa - if you tell children all over the world that you don't actually know if they're good or bad won't that make more of them want to be bad?
A: I don't think so. I have faith that kids know to be good and are good without the threat of having me watch them all the time to motivate them.
Q: Wow, Santa. I grew up thinking you were over my shoulder all the time.
A: I'm sorry you thought that. I wasn't.
CONTINUED IN PART II-
Q: Hello, Santa. Have you had a good year?
A: Yes, Archie, hello. It has been an excellent year.
Q: How big is the naughty list this year, Santa?
A: Bigger than ever. We just might set a record. We haven't seen a year like this since 1968.
Q: I remember that year.
A: I'll bet you do, Archie. What did you do with all that coal?
Q: (laughs) We had a barbeque, of course. Santa, are you still giving coal out to bad little kids?
A: No, no. That's an old wives tale, actually. Coal back in the old days was actually a good thing. Folks needed it to cook and to stay warm. A child might not want to get coal instead of a toy, but they never turned it away. Nowadays, giving coal to a child would be a little mean, I think.
Q: How do you know if a kid has been bad or good?
A: Well, to be honest, you can just kind of tell. In my mind, all kids are good. I mean, they're kids, they don't know everything. I don't think there are too many who intend to be bad.
Q: So why then all the focus on the naughty list?
A: Hey, you asked the question, I didn't bring it up.
Q: Yes, but you said it was the worst year since 1968.
A: Yes, but weren't you about 9 years old that year? If I recall right, Archie, you had a pretty rough year in 1968.
Q: I think you're right. But I still think I had a good Christmas.
A: Yes, you had a great Christmas. You were a rowdy kid. But look at you now. You're okay. I always knew you would be. You're an inspiration to children everywhere, Archie. If you can come around anyone can.
Q: Oh, Santa, stop it.
A: Ok, but enough about this naughty business. The world is too caught up with this whole idea of Santa knowing who's good and who's not.
Q: Kids everywhere are worried if they are on the list though - how can they tell?
A: Oh, those that are know it, believe me. If you're unsure, then you're probably not on the list.
Q: How much of your time do you spend on the Naughty List, Santa?
A: None. A kid ends up on the naughty list because his Mom or Dad wants him there, usually. I get lots of letters and most are from kids but many come from parents too. They usually want to know what to do about a rowdy kid and sometimes they put their own kid on the naughty list.
Q: Really? What kind of Mom would put her own kid on Santa's Naughty List?
A: Usually a very good mom. If a Mom comes to me with this kind of a problem that means she is intent on making it better. My hat is off to Moms like that. Look, the naughty list is just that - a list. Like going to the grocery store, it's just something to remind you. Being on the naughty list doesn't mean you won't have a good Christmas. And it doesn't mean you'll get coal. It just means we need to work with that kid a little more and that means different things for different kids. But I'm not about tracking bad kids. I don't have time for such silliness.
Q: Really, Santa? What about all that "he knows when you're sleeping" stuff?
A: Pretty simple, really. A kid usually sleeps with his eyes closed. When I see a kid with his eyes closed I assume he's asleep. That's how I know.
Q: You mean that if a kid is doing something bad you don't actually know it or see it?
A: Not always. I don't have time to watch every kid. But if a kid is out of line I usually hear about it.
Q: Are you sure you want that information going out to the world?
A: I believe in being honest. I never once said I was a spy. That was something the world made up, but it never came from me.
Q: But Santa - if you tell children all over the world that you don't actually know if they're good or bad won't that make more of them want to be bad?
A: I don't think so. I have faith that kids know to be good and are good without the threat of having me watch them all the time to motivate them.
Q: Wow, Santa. I grew up thinking you were over my shoulder all the time.
A: I'm sorry you thought that. I wasn't.
CONTINUED IN PART II-